* this whole entry is going to be rather graphic and rather gross. i would advise those with weak hearts not to read it :/

oh my god. this morning was definitely the worst morning of my life. i really thought i was going to die. after watching the soccer finals n packing my bag for union camp DAY 0 the next morn, i set off to slp at 6am. however for the next two hrs i spent the time retching and diarrhoeaing inta toilet. it was the most disgusting and pathetic sight ever. when my stomach pains first occured i thought it was mere hunger pangs, and i stupidly went to drink a cup of milk ( i say stupid cz later on jensen told me that one shd nv ever ever ever drink milk when one is having diarrhoea.. well how the bloody hell was i suppose to knw!! ) well.. the milk didnt stay in my tummy long.. i puked it out less than 10 min later :/ went to the toilet.. sat on the seat.. just in case i was having a tummy ache. no sooner.. my whole body was covered with cold sweat and i started shivering and feeling breathless. my energy was completey drained out as the stomach pains got worse and worse.. i was pretty sure i was going to black out anytime soon. as i thought i was going to die and things couldnt possibly get any worse, i felt that i was about to vomit. i looked around for a pail nearby that i could grasp for but of cz.. i saw none. i decided not to risk leaving the toilet seat and instead happily vomitted all over my left foot and the toilet floor 4 times consecutively! it was the sickest thing ever. i had the worst diarrhoea ever!! and seriously no matter how sick this might sound.. i cldnt blif how much i managed to puke and shit out. (i actually lost 1.5kg after tt) it was amazing. meanwhile my stomach pains were sooooo bad i knew i had to hurry rid myself of whatever poisoned food there was in my tummy before i die. despite me nearly blacking out countless times, i forced myself to hang on and prayed to god many many many times to let this pass (its been a really really really long time since i last prayed) After god knows how long, after the pain was more bearable, i used up all my remaining energy to flush, wash my hands (i had no energy left to clean my foot that was covered in vomit) open the toilet door and collasped on the floor outside crying out for my mom and basically just screaming for help. It took pretty long to get them to help considering i couldnt scream very loudly and they were really tired and were happily sleeping. After i heard some sort of response and my mom's footsteps drawing near i blacked out (one funny thing was tht while i was down on the floor my dog was standing over me sniffing me and just walking to and fro around my head).After awhile i came to and heard my moms panicked voice..' OH MY GOD. DID U FALL DOWN AND HURT YOURSELF?!?!' i just squirmed and cried on the floor and pointed to my tummy. (i guess she saw the vomit in the toilet and figured out what was happening). soon my dad mom and maid were lifting me off to my room to lay me on the bed (what was really disgusting was my left foot was still covered in vomit and i refused to let it touch the ground or my bed). After alot more crying as a result of the ever so painful but thankfully subsiding stomach pains i finally fell asleep out of exhaustion about an hour later. although i was inta grossest state ever (imagine vomit-covered-foot, clammy and cold-sweated body, actually i think having just vomit is gross enough) i felt so relieved and so grateful that i was no longer completey drained of energy, no longer having difficulty breathing, no longer experiencing constant and acute stomach pains, no longer retching, no longer crying, no longer blacking out but in fact experiencing and indulging in the simplicity and tranquility of that moment in time where i felt nothing but peace and quiet. i was in limbo.. and i was caught btw a moment in time. where i was at that moment n wat i felt could not be anything or feel any less than a little piece of heaven. even tho i prob only managed to sleep at 8+ am.. with only less than 3 hrs of slp i actually got out of bed and went for union camp day 0! i cldnt blif it.. mich cldnt blif it.. well i guess noone will blif it. i dont know why i did it.. but i guess after feeling so completely helpless, powerless and weak at the hands of my stupid yet ever severe food poisoning i wanted to prove to myself that it would not stop me from carrying on my day and that i would be a responsible councillor and make it down there to help my og and make the camp a success! -.- i also did not want any fingers to be pointing at me (long story). unfortunately for the rest of the day i had food phobia (which is totally unlike me btw.. ask anyone!!) and didnt eat till the later part of the day when i cldnt tahan alr. hai. simply the worst morning of my life. hopefully after this horrid incident things would look up and ill have many many good times to come? :( alright union camp day 1 starts tmr. i better go slp and rest my frail tired n broken body! lol.

kc : i really really really really miss you and my sis ALOT! what would i do wout the two of you i really cannot imagine :/